Tough love, a letter

On Friday and Saturday, I was watching the conversations from the grand opening of Andrea Lewicki’s wonderful curiosity project on and off. I tuned in and figured out how to sign in via Twitter by the final conversation where Andrea was talking with Judy Clement Wall. The whole conversation left me inspired.

One snippet that stayed with me the most clearly was about the possibility of acknowledging our inner critic, accepting it as a part of ourselves, and possibly writing it a love letter. A letter that would say something along the lines of, “I love you. Thank you. But shut up now.”

It got me thinking. It kept me up late that night. And yesterday I decided to write my inner critic a love letter. A more or less tough love letter. Hope you won’t mind me sharing it with you (like I did last Monday) as an ending to my Month of Love Letters.

 

Dear I.C. (Inner Critic),

I’m writing to let you know how much I love and appreciate you.
As weird as it may sound, it’s actually comforting to know you’ll second guess every single decision I make, no matter how big or small. I think that’s because I always strive to do my best with everything and paired up with I.P. (Inner Perfectionist) you’re doing such a great job of keeping me in check.

However, I’m also writing to let you know that I won’t always listen to you from now on.
Sometimes a little quiet time is nice. And much needed.

Starting today, I’ll let myself off the hook and accept that I am only human. I’ll accept that I truly am doing my absolute best, that I am doing exactly what I need to be doing.
I’ll trust my instincts. I’ll focus on myself even when the world is screaming for my attention. And I’ll try to remind myself that I don’t need to change anything about myself.

Even when you disagree – I’ll trust that I’m perfect just the way I am.   

Love,
~ Estrella

 

How about you? What would you say to your inner critic? Feel free to share your letter in the comments below, I’d love to see your responses :)

PS: Would you like it if I occasionally shared more love letters?

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19 Responses to “Tough love, a letter”

  1. I LOVE your letter. Here’s my favorite part: “I’m also writing to let you know that I won’t always listen to you from now on.
    Sometimes a little quiet time is nice. And much needed.”

    That is perfect. Perhaps I’ll just use your letter and send it to my little voice. Thank you for coming on Saturday. It meant a lot to me that you were there. xoxo

    • Thank you so much for dropping by to read my letter, j, even though you consider it as such, I.P. says it’s far from perfect. I say it’s as perfect as it should be – coming straight from the heart.
      I won’t mind you sending this to your little voice, just don’t let it criticize you for using mine ;)
      And you’re more than welcome, j, I was so happy to be able to stay up and watch/listen to the conversation! It meant so much that you noticed my being there. *huge hugs*

  2. What would I say to my inner critic? Shut up, you’re giving me a headache! :)

  3. There was a time when my inner critic would not let me get a word in edgewise. I have learned to be more assertive. I have not learned how to make it shut up, but humming advertising jingles can drown it out temporarily.

    You write wonderful love letters.

  4. Brava, my dear! gives me inspiration to quiet my IC from time to time :-)

  5. This letter was PERFECT! I have to say – I’ve enjoyed your love letter series! I suspect if I was going to write to my inner critic, I’d say the same thing – but much less eloquently than you!

  6. I LOVE this letter, it reminded me of the things I’d say to my inner critic. Thank you!
    I would probably not be quite so gentle in my message, but harsher. I liked your tone throughout this. Oh, and I’d love to read more of your love letters sometime, hope you will post more on here.

  7. Hi Estrella! Yay! I think it’s important to set boundaries. I think your letter to your IC did just that!

    I’m glad you hung out with us at the Grand Opening!

  8. I loved reading this! Love the way you gently asserted yourself. “Even when you disagree – I’ll trust that I’m perfect just the way I am.” Very inspirational. I like the way you acknowledged your IC’s and IP’s positive traits, but then you drew the line about where they stop being helpful. Feels like good boundary setting, but without yelling :~)

    A couple of years ago I wrote a conversation between my IK (Inner Kid) and Igor, my IC. They weren’t nice to each other (though I had fun writing it and there’s some grim humor to it) but I felt better after IK got to assert herself. I wrote it on a 10K Day, and I decided this month to dig it out and repost it. That will go up a few days before the 10K Day if you want to see it.

    • I just noticed I haven’t replied, though I meant to… I was sure I have actually, not sure what happened.
      However, since I missed it, I’ll just leave the same thing I commented on your post (http://goo.gl/88rz6):
      You said you liked my letter to my Inner Critic two weeks ago, which was such a great boost of extra confidence, but this here is pure gold to read.
      Loved this conversation, Milli, it was really inspirational and funny and just perfect – Igor is proud, I take it

  9. Beautiful Inner Critic Love Letter! And yes, I did write mine and told it to take a vacation! However, it’s probably time to write another…

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