Weddings? Well… proposal first :P

bunzyes22Wedding season is upon us, in fact very IN right now, as it started a few months back already :) and as you watch excited friends and family members scurry down the aisle, you might be wondering: When will it be my turn to tie the knot?

It is really not unusual to get antsy about ascending to the next stage in your relationship, especially when you see friends of the same age (or younger!!! that probably hurts the most :P) already in the land of happily ever after. Of course, not everyone needs a ring to create a lifetime commitment with their partner, but for those who do want to get married, waiting for the proposal can be agonizing…

So.. why in the world isn’t he proposing? Here are a few examples and suggestions.

Men Don’t Hear the Clock Ticking. While men are fertile well into elderly years (Hello, Hef!), the biological clock keeps a different timetable for women. Even though medical advancements can now allow women to have babies well into their forties, the chances of conceiving and carrying a healthy baby to term decrease rapidly with age. Men often do not realize the extent of this fertility timetable, and even if they do, they might not feel the same pressure to settle down. The good news as to why he hasn’t proposed yet in this case? It’s not you — it’s Mother Nature.

Men Dread the Big Day. Not all women dream of the big day and the white gown, but many do. And as a result, some women crave marriage more than men, simply because they can’t wait to be PRINCESS for a day! However, the groom-to-be usually feels something akin to dread – and it’s really not because he doesn’t want to spend the rest of his life with his blushing bride, but because he doesn’t want to spend hours deciding table arrangements or corralling his family into a reception hall. The upshot? Be sure your man knows your future wedding isn’t going to be a three-ring circus, and get him thinking about possible honeymoon spots. The thought of you in a bikini in Aruba, Hawaii, where ever, might get him down on one knee :) You just need a bit of psychology :P

Men Want to Be Prepared. Yes, romantic comedies make spontaneous proposals look tempting, but the truth is that marriages fare better in situations where the finances and big life decisions are already planned out. If you and your significant other haven’t seriously discussed marriage, let alone where you will live, if you will have kids, etc., chances are that he hasn’t proposed because your relationship isn’t prepared for that next step. The cure? Figure out if your life plans are on the same track by casually mentioning your own future goals, whether it is to own a business, buy a house, or have a baby. A good conpromise in this case is moving in together for example. You will at least have the assurrance that your relationship IS going towards a proposal and finally a wedding too.

Men Fear the Proposal Moment. Have you ever thought about how scary it must be to plan what is supposed to be the most romantic moment of you and your partner’s life? From JumboTron proposals to hiding engagement rings inside of chocolate, fortune coockies, previous grooms have created a lot for your partner to live up to. Assuage his fears by letting him know that skywriting is nice, but sweet, simple gestures are the best, something your own style of being together.

Finally, if you know that you are ready for the next step in your relationship, but you still haven’t seen any bling, you might want to consider summoning up your bravery and popping the question yourself! That goes well too :P

PS: give me some feedback if you agree, don’t agree, tried it, etc. :)

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One Comment to “Weddings? Well… proposal first :P”

  1. i don’t like it when women “pop” the question, but men really need to be prepared! :)

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