A real man!

What I’m about to say in this post, is something I noticed in my best friend a long time ago. While I was bored out of my mind yesterday, I thought I’d like to have in writing this string of ideas… and who knows, maybe it’ll help someone :)

I think women are always searching for a good man. Usually we don’t want guys who ignore us, who drink them self to sleep (even if in a pub), who are embarrassing, rude, or womanizing. But where could we find someone nice, caring… a real man?

Good men come in all shapes, sizes and colors, and one of the most outstanding features he’ll have, is that a real man is one of the few who know how to keep to themselves. Don’t get me wrong, we all have different personalities, and nobody is perfect, but he’s at least close to it, unlike many guys out there.
If asked, why he doesn’t have a girlfriend, he’ll say: I haven’t found the right girl yet. A good man isn’t about to waste his time and energy on just any woman he can pick up in any bar, at the movies, etc. he’s looking for the right woman. That’s why you will not see him around with a different girl every other weekend. That’s too tacky for him.
And when he has one, he displays proudly of his girlfriend, tries to understand her in any circumstance, treats her right, opens/holds doors for her, lets her cut his way, buys her presents and stuff she’d like even without reason, etc.
He’s usually alone or with family, if he’s with friends generally it’s only one maybe sometimes two. People love him because he’s nice, caring, polite, helpful, genuine and he’s not flashy.
He is very seldom rude and rarely gets angry and even if he does, you would not necessarily know it because he controls it well.
You’ve probably known him for years, a best guy friend, a neighbour, a class/workmate who you’ve worked beside for a long time.
Because he makes you feel so comfortable you tell him everything and when you talk to him he looks straight into your eyes and actually listens to what you have to say, he gives you a little feedback but very seldom tells you what you should do.
He never pretends, doesn’t gossip and wouldn’t dream of telling your personal secrets.

In my opinion, all you girls/women out there shouldn’t choose to continue seeking love from guys who want nothing more than to use you, you should take a closer look at the guy who has always been there for you even though you’ve not always been there for him.
Think about it. Would you like the perception of happiness or true happiness? It’s your choice, I hope you make the right one.

And now, let me tell you what happened with my best friend:
We’ve known each other since 2003 :) A guy just like I described, a guy who was more interested in walking me
home from school, talking to me in between classes and all our spare time (from after school to late at night) on the internet, than trying to feel me up. I felt safe with him then and still do.
I knew he’s really what I’d like a boyfriend to be like and I’ve even thought about what it would be like to date him. But then I came up with that same old lame excuse women have used for decades to avoid happiness: ”I’m afraid to date him because if it doesn’t work out it might ruin our friendship.” That’s a cop-out and I knew it, I was just afraid… I’m only human too…

Here’s a guy who I know is nice, treats me great, knows everything about me (even my secrets) and still likes me…
What more could I ask for? What did I tell my friends about this guy? “Oh, (yes, I am attracted to him, but) he’s my best friend!”
And then it hit me! One of the most valuable components of a successful relationship is that your mate is your best friend! What’s really great about this is that I actually created this perfect situation over time and didn’t even know it.

I’m lucky to say, that after I realized this, and he realized the same about me… we had our ups and downs, but we’re a couple for almost 3 years now, we’re still best friends too and I dare to say: we get along much better than most couples. :* And hopefully, we will get around to have a wonderful life together, and everything works out the way we’re planning now.

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One Comment to “A real man!”

  1. M. Not to judge or anything, but how can you live your life like that? I understand that a lot of people are rude, stupid, and other things… but that’s no reason to don’t have any friends, you just have to see who you can trust and who is worth being your friend.

    T. You’re very lucky, I hope we can be together for so long and still love each other :)

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