A month of giving what you need

March was the month of giving what you need to get. j said it better than I could express at the moment: “I believe in karma. I believe that, more often than not, we get back what we put out into the world, so why not put out what you’re hoping to receive… Love. Permission. Attention. Forgiveness. Fun. Massages. Cheesecake… Even if you don’t get back exactly what you give, I bet you’ll get back what you need. Love begets love.” That was her theory.

So I embarked on the journey and quickly found out that it was slightly harder than I thought. And not because I wasn’t willing to give in general and to give what I needed.

Giving love, friendship, time (as much as that could be given away), a smile, a heart, a hug, an ear and a shoulder, returning a kiss, a look, a touch, reaching out, replying to an email, playing their favorite song to cheer someone up, fulfilling silly requests just because they’d make someone happy – these were all easy.

Getting what I needed… now that was the slightly tough part.

I found this month harder than the ones preceding it because not expecting anything in return while giving what you need is tricky to say the least.

What have I learned from this experience?
A valuable lesson: when we shift on the expectations management button and are patient enough – we do get back what we need even if not in the exact form or from who we would’ve thought.

“Where your heart breaks and where it mends are rarely the same place, and that’s okay.” ~ Judy Clement Wall

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6 Comments to “A month of giving what you need”

  1. I was just thinking about this last night, because I need to summarize my experience for the month. Your take is slightly different than mine, but also true. It’s not just that I was looking in the wrong place to get what I needed, I was also expecting a certain thing… the thing I gave. What I got back was often not at all what I expected or thought I needed. This: “we do get back what we need even if not in the exact form or from who we would’ve thought” is the real lesson we should take away. Plus, for me, I think I discovered that I don’t always know what I need before I get it. ;-)

    • Yes, expecting the exact thing we give is tricky because maybe the other person is also giving what they need (and we don’t need that so to say). Like wanting to hang out when we’d rather lock ourself in a room until we’re finished with that poem we started a week ago.
      Your last sentence here is another thing I also noticed, more often than not I don’t know what I need either before I get it. But that makes it so much more valuable actually! ;)

  2. Good karma will pay you back in good ways. Maybe not what you were expecting, but good does bring about more good.

  3. I love this post Estrella! That is our family motto – “You get what you give, so give love”. But you’re right, it can be difficult at times, especially to give to those who don’t seem to deserve it, (at least at the moment), but giving is always worth whatever effort it takes, for we will be blessed, maybe not with the same thing or what we think we need, or even the same time, but someday something we desparately need will come to us.

    • I love that that’s your family motto, Deanna, ever since I first learned of it! One of the very best things one can teach their children, such a great motto to live by. Thanks for stopping by and reinforcing my belief in giving love :)

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