Archive for June 11th, 2012

2012, June 11

How’s your day so far?

Warning, sarcasm below.

My day is going splendidly so far. (On top of everything else) I’m currently supporting a new look. Outfit and hairstyle generously provided by today’s lovely weather.

You can achieve it too, with just a few simple steps:

  • look for any hint of clouds on the sky – there should be none, so don’t bother taking an umbrella
  • go run errands
  • optionally add a pair of glasses or sunglasses
  • (for the full blown effect you should also have long hair (waist-length is optimal!))

If you followed the steps correctly, you should be:

  • walking around running errands in blazing hot weather, burning sun
  • arriving to the 4th floor to room #317, waiting half an hour before getting sent to the 1st floor to room #3 from where you get sent back to the 4th floor to room #320. You should get a ticket number now which is on the 1st floor. Go down, then back up again. Wait for another 15 minutes and then inevitably get sent back to room #317. Only half resolve what you needed so you won’t get bored tomorrow and can make another trip back there (probably for the same treatment as today). Wait in line 20 more minutes downstairs at the cashiers.
    The look on your face should be just right by the time you finish with this part.
  • walking home in what at first seemed like a few innocent drops of rain which instead turn into a storm – complete with lightning and thunder

The end result being:

  • soaking wet clothes in a matter of minutes
  • soaking wet hair in even less than the above

You can now:

  • lose the glasses/sunglasses unless they came with tiny windshield wipers
  • the previous step will help with highlighting your running eyeliner
  • for good measure, make sure to step in a few deep puddles
  • and then, for finishing off the look, also step into some dog poo
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