What will you never allow in your home?

Sort of a rant following, hope you’ll excuse me.

I will never allow smoking in my home.

I honestly don’t care if it’s my father, mother in law or whomever really, smoking will never be allowed in my home.

Because, yes it’s their decision if they want to screw up their health, but once they’re in my home, then it all becomes about my health and my family’s health. Not to mention it’s just plain and simple: stinky!

When we go to terraces with friends, I try to sit as far as possible from tables where people are smoking. It bothers me so much so, that I sometimes get sick from being in a room where there’s smoking.

I’ve lived in a place where people smoked. Not in my room, but in theirs and in the kitchen. It didn’t matter too much that they weren’t in my room, it was just as bad or worse since second hand smoking is even worse. Three years of that was enough.


10 Comments to “What will you never allow in your home?”

  1. I agree with what you’ve written here – smoking is a disgusting habit. One thing that I won’t let into my house is abuse – it just won’t be tolerated. Abuse comes in many forms (verbal, physical, mental, etc.), but any form of it or manipulation is not allowed. If it does find it’s way in, then I will show it the door real quick. Hmm… So many more things that will never be allowed in my home… Thanks for the great post and thought-provoking question!

    • That is the best answer!

      Smoking came to mind because of how stinky all my clothes got after an outing, and it prompted this post. This all came out in a blur, but of course, serious issues like abuse is something I won’t allow either.
      I like my own question, should come up with a whole list of things I won’t allow.

  2. I’ll never allow TV in the bedroom. My hearing is so sharp I can’t stand anything too loud, and anyways, I feel a TV doesn’t belong in a bedroom.

  3. Here at your humble service, Estrella, I’m offering my answer.
    It’s the answer I stand by:

    Anything short of friendship, respect and equality.

    I’ll tell you a short story. My grandfather passed recently. Gran and I look after each other, so she doesn’t have to be alone and she can stay at home. They bought this house 30 years ago; it was a rat-trap. “Paw” cleaned it up and got it livable and together they turned it into a home. I am 42 now. I have pictures of us standing together in front of the Anemone (thimble-weed) when I was 13. All this time, hanging at the side door, off the patio to the garden, a plaque hangs for all to see. It says, “May you always find friendship in this house”.

    A woman who comes over for bridge games is difficult to stomach, she slinks, she is awkwardly demanding and assumes that others are placed strategically about the world in order to make her life easier to bear. Her husband is a very patient man, and has developed a humorous palette of tics over their 35 years together. They are basically decent people.

    She tests my patience, however I find that I am a great deal happier if I simply allow her to have her way, let her be the person she wants to be and if I make it a practice to do everything I can do to live up to the promise of that plaque then I feel content that I have upheld the promise that helps make this place bot just a house, but home.

    Perhaps this will serve as one simple example of how integrity informs our decisions. One can choose to “endure”, but it only feels like that when one secretly covets the false satisfaction of the hammer. Let it go, in and out, and smile, and forget about the little things.

    Thank you for your patience, and thank you for another gripping post, Estrella.

    • That is a lovely story, thank you for sharing! You’re so right, friendship, respect and equality is what needs to be in a home, anything short of that needs to be shown the door. And yes, so true, one can choose to endure, but it only really works if one’s serious about it.

  4. This is really interesting, and my answer is: lies. I just don’t think one can get past dishonesty…

    • Good answer. It is tough to get past dishonesty, you are left with a nagging feeling of “are they really telling the truth or are they hiding something again?” type questions.

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